Put it on Ice

Jan 2, 2013 Begin the Rant    Bad website filed under: Cherry Bombs, Cluster Bombs

Okay… I understand this dude is associated with the 90s, but this is taking it too far. A hit counter? A click to enter page? The lame Photoshop graphics are par for the course… If you are a crappy rapcore group, 10 years ago.

You know what? They probably used Gimp. Idiots. This whole site screams “I made this for my bro, Ice, for a nickel bag of weed and a backstage pass to one of his shows.”

Okay… Lets do this. Let’s click to enter.

BOOM!

Huge social icons, grunge textures, more lame photoshopped graphics, a SECOND attempt to get people to follow Ice on Twitter… This is starting to look really pathetic. I guess he really wants to be relevant again.

That nav is hard to see, but the massive blinged out “V-ice” logo is pretty easy to see. Of course, you can’t click on it or anything. That’s what passes for eye candy. If you scroll down past the discography you will find animated spinning gifs of his logo thing. I guess his designer must really be stuck in the 90s.

The whole site is a riot of bad choices. Red text on a red background is hard to read. Cramming all your junk in the header makes it hard to read. “Edgy” type mixed with textures and pseudo-3D styles is hard to read.

Big old graphics for everything, on a slow server, makes for a slow website. A free cut and paste forum on your page, supported by ads, make you look like a total amateur.

All this page makes me think of is that the dude wasted all his money on hookers and blow, and now he’s just trying really hard to get people to think he’s still somebody. It ain’t working. I feel like he needs a big hug or something. And a day job.

http://vanillaice.com

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